11 months post op.

Five months since I have written. Boy how time flies.  So many of you have asked if I was still going to be writing on my blog. And I believe I have told everyone that yes I will continue. But then I didn't.  So I have been sitting here thinking of why I didn't make my blog the priority.
Some of you know that we lost my father in law this summer. Taking care of him during hospice took a lot. Even though all of Markies siblings were here and involved, emotionally it took its toll. Then trying to get some summer in with Dontae before school starts. Then school. Not to forget trying to get my craft cottage all done. So something had to take a back seat, and guess what it was.

Check this out.

Not bad huh?  I wanted to hit 100lbs by November 14,2017, That would be one year, but its not going to happen and that is ok. My knee has been awful.  When I can finally start exercising again, I am going to rock. 30 more lbs to go.

One thing I am enjoying is wearing clothes and figuring out styles.  My daughter Calie is trying to teach me not to be so matchy matchy. LOL She wants me to go out of the box a little. For example, LOL I bought a pair of leopard pumps, to wear with my black leggings black top and my leopard duster.  Ohhhhhhh NOOOOOOOOO apparently you can't do that, LOL Ok well that is why I bought

the shoes. So I am taking back the shoes. Why have them if I can't even wear them with my cute duster. LOL   Anyway its been fun, Calie is helping me stay hip.  ha ha ha

I will go back in my blog and see where I left off and try to fill in the blanks, just not today. See you soon.

the shoed

One day shy of 6 months

Just noticed that last I wrote was exactly two months ago today. I should of wrote on here sooner but all my appointments got messed up, and didn't really happen. But my 6 month check up is on the 25th I believe. Already did the blood work portion of it. Like 6 or 7 vile's of blood. They kept asking me "are you ok" LOL. Then down in shoreline I will have the bod pod, exercise, Psychiatrist, nutritionist, and finally Dr. Kaufman.  I am excited to see him, since I haven't since November 14, 2016.
I am down 57 lbs. So from month 4 to month 6 its only been a total of 13lbs. I say only because I would of liked to have been down another pant size. I am not complaining though. 
One of the reasons I got the surgery was my left knee that I hurt in gymnastics in middle school. Dr. arrogant, not like women Hoelstien said that if I got some weight off I could delay surgery for years hopefully. Well its progressively getting worse, actually had to go to a cane and pain pills. Being hurt with my neck and back for 16 years, I thought I had a high pain tolerance. After that much time, if you want to have some normalcy in your life with NO pain meds, you suck it up and and pretend your doing great pain free. But holy cow, this knee pain is out of control to the point that I can not deal with it at all. So I messaged a friend from school days that said he had a double knee surgery and that he was very happy with his Dr. He said it was Dr. Oswin. I called right away and he see's me on Monday. Dave told me this man was arrogant as well. Thats ok if he uses that because he is a great Dr. and not that he doesn't like women. LOL He is married but he still is a jerk. A great looking jerk, but still a jerk and that out weighs his looks. So please pray that Oswin will be a fit for me,because I want this knee replaced yesterday. However, here is the thing. I need all the arthritis and scar tissue removed from where I had surgery on my neck. I meet again with Landau on Monday as well. My hope would be to do these together  on the same day. That way I wouldn't have to go under two times and then recovery time for both procedures. So I will know more on Monday.
As far as my sleeve goes. I am still learning things. But one thing that is not catching on is me eating to fast, then getting sick. Almost every night at dinner, Dontae says "Mom you better slow down"  LOL I Love that kid. I will keep you up on my next appointment with Eviva. Thanks for wanting to read my story.

A picture says a lot

I'm just shy of 4 months. I went in for my check up and my surgeon was caught up in surgery, so we had to reschedule. I was bummed because I haven't seen Dr. Kaufman since the day of my surgery.  So my appointment isn't until the end of the month. I want to share now because I think I am over my plateau. Either that or I am learning more and more of how to eat properly. I also have a new app on my phone called  "My fitness pal" that really takes the guess out of things. I know they want me at about 80grams of protein, under 50grams of carbs. and about 1000 calories. And all my vitamins and all my water. I will not give up my one cup of great coffee with cream and sugar, so instead of having a huge mug full twice like I used too, I just have one cup, and every so often I will have a second cup. And I am happy. I only get sick if I forget to eat S L O W..... and its crazy to think that once you get sick from eating to fast that you would ever eat fast again. But I must of ate fast before surgery, because it does happen more then I like.
I have been exercising,  not hard core or anything, and since my walk with Dontae when we walked way past our destination and didn't even know it, my knee has given me grief. The Dr. told me to only walk on flat surfaces but I didn't listen. My knee was feeling so great after getting some weight off that I thought I could do it. Well the walk was a month ago and my knee is still killing me. So walking is out for now. I hope I can continue as the weather starts to get nicer. 
So since I am just about at my 4 month mark, I decided to have Markie take my picture. It's the strangest thing though. I look at this picture and I just can't believe what I looked like and what I look like today. My eyes see the difference, but I don't feel the difference. But I do, because as of today I put on a size 14 pant, and those are new pajamas in this picture and they are a size large. WHAT!!!! But I still feel like an oinker. It's a head thing I tell ya. I have lost 46lbs. My goal is 54 more lbs. I will continue meeting with all the Dr.'s through out this first year, and will work on my head thing LOL.

3 month post op

It is really 3 1/2 months. I can't believe how time gets away from me. When I have people private messaging me asking how I am doing, that is when I know I am behind.  So I apologize for that.
I did have my 3 month check up which would of sparked me to write on here, but unfortunately when I got to my appointment, my surgeon was running 45 mins. behind, so we decided to re book. However I did get weighed and am down 41 lbs. I am so close to fitting into a size 14. I have been an 18 for so so long that I was almost forgetting. I just need to go down from a 14 two more sizes and I will hit my goal. A size 10, that was the weight I got married and it was pretty easy to stay at that weight.
All the hibernation syndrome is gone (Thank God) I am feeling so much better. Feeling so good that Dontae and I decided to start walking. Well LOL I made a couple mistakes. The Dr. told me to walk on level serfaces (for my back and my knee) But I thought we could walk the urban trail down to my daughters house and then Markie could pick us up.  That way I wasn't walking up hill. It was after dinner and Dontae insisted on bringing a flashlight. So we set out. We got lost LOL (I really don't know how) now its dark.  I thanked Dontae for taking such good care of Mama because he had a flashlight and we could see.  He was so proud. Any hoo we ended up walking from Vining st to Orleans. Way to long for my first time out. My knee was freaking killing me. But other parts of my body felt fantastic. Needless to say it is now  hurting more then it is not. The rest of me feels pretty darn good, so I hope to soon start to exercise more without the chronic pain.
Eating is getting better and better. I am really starting to understand what I can and can't eat. Bread is one thing that I don't really eat. It does not work with me. So I keep on going on and trying new things to see what messes with me and what doesn't.
I haven't experienced the hair loss and I hope it stays that way, since I have pretty short hair right now. I also went and had a facial and I haven't had one of those since beauty school 36 years ago.  And it was AMAZING!!!! I am sold!!!!!
Since I needed to reschedule my appointment, I am just going to skip the three month and go right to my 4 month. See you then!!!!!!

Hibernation syndrome

Starting at about week three after surgery I think it was, all I wanted to do was sleep and sit in my chair and do Pinterest or play games on my phone all in between me sleeping. I did not want to go anywhere I did not want to answer my phone or texts.  I didn't really get that something was going on with me other then just having major surgery.  But my Markie said to me one day that for the last couple of weeks I had been really quite and all I do is play games and go on Pinterest.  When he said that I started paying attention more to my body. And he was so right, I was even not showering every day, some of the days I didn't even brush my teeth. (Hey, I never went more then one day LOL)  but still that's gross.  A lot of people get depressed.  That is one thing I can say that I was not, which is strange for my other symptoms. Some get very emotional. I was really kinda happy but just wanted to do nothing. The hibernation syndrome happens to at least half of the patients. And I wish I knew about it ahead of time, so I could of prepared myself. I didn't know of this until yesterday.
You see, our bodies start to notice that we are not taking in enough calories. Our body is missing food and thinks this is a famine and struggles to conserve our energy. So our body makes us tired and or depressed, so we don't have the motivation to do anything. This stage can last several weeks. And boy my has. I have felt darn good yesterday and today, so I am hoping its over. Time will tell.  Its kinda been a drag having this go on, trying to figure out the new food and eating thing not to mention recovering from surgery.
When our bodies decide to get out of this stage our body has to say to itself "gee this famine is lasting a bit to long. If I keep conserving my energy with inactivity, I will starve to death. I'd better use my last store of energy ( the remaining fat and muscles in our body ) to hunt up some food."
At this point our body will switch from getting energy from food, to getting energy from our fat (and muscle too if we don't eat enough protein) and that is what we want.  Once our body goes through this stage then the real Kim will come back. LOL  
It's so strange how our bodies work. I told Markie today that I feel like my body is loosing weight now.  And maybe this hibernation thing is why I only lost 5 lbs last month. Especially with learning how to eat right.  I do hope its over, I really want to go back to being me. Like I said, yesterday and today have been good, great actually, so maybe I made it through.

Two Months

Had my two month check up. The first thing I said to my nutritionist was "I don't think I have lost anything, can that even happen? LOL  She said Yes, you are just standing on the landing of the stairs. That is how the weight loss will happen for you now. I will be on the landing, and then there will be a weight drop, then back on the landing.
So off to be weighed.   FIVE Lbs.  WHAT!!!!!!!  I may have said I didn't think I lost anything, but it didn't mean I wanted it to be right. So my nutritionist and I sat down to talk.  I had many questions about food choices and how I have been feeling etc. And the main thing I found out is I am not eating right. Which totally makes sense to me now, and why I am feeling hunger pains. She told me if I am feeling real hunger pains, then I am starving to death. She told me that I no matter what I am eating, I need to eat the protein first, or some of it. Lets say we made tacos, the protein in taco's is the meat and the cheese right. Well I just ate the taco, I can only eat one. I found out that the protein part needs to go in first, then I can eat the taco. I wrote her today to ask her "why"? why do I need to do that, its just not making sense to me. This is what she wrote.

You are stacking your food of your meal to use the new anatomy of your stomach (long and narrow) to serve your better. It keeps the small amount of food you are eating in your stomach longer and stacking it up so it reaches the upper stretch receptors at the top of your stomach. These stretch receptors at the top have the job of letting your brain know that the food is full and has reached the top. “You are comfortably topped off.”  When you put a solid form of protein 1st, it lands on the bottom of the stomach where you have different stretch receptors near the exit valve which the weight send a different message to your brain - “food has started to arrive and it has weight”.   Solid protein is a more complex food that takes time to process and is able to exit the stomach s-l-o-w-l-y over time.  Then other food that you eat after the bottom protein food will stack up on top of this 1st protein so as it can’t leave until the solid protein has slowly exited. Hence, your small amount of food total for your feeding gives impression that you have had a more enduring and complete meal. In other words, you are essentially sort of telling your brain that you have a “full” meal which is truly small sized.   If a person who does not have a sleeve but eats a solid protein food as part of their meal but not necessarily1st will fill more satisfied. But a non-sleeve stomach will rearrange it around.

So, today I did it right, and lo and be hold I feel better.  So now maybe I will get my energy back and can start back to exercising. Like I have said before, this process sure has a huge learning curve. I am still happy I took this step and I am down 35 lbs.

Sick of getting sick

 I wish I could get this eating thing figured out. It is really starting to upset me. I have not figured out why or when it happens. Last night once again I had to leave Markie and Dontae at the dinner table while I got in my recliner till this sickness passed. Now this morning, I had one piece of toast and a protein shake (only half) and here I sit. So this morning, I can't go to church.
What I do know is I can't eat to fast, I can't take to big of bites, and I have to chew really well, all that's a no no, and I will feel sick quite quickly.
 When I say I feel sick, what I mean is my tummy hurts, I feel like I have a big rock stuck  right between my boobs, that is lodged, so much gas that I have to burp and burp and nauseous. And then usually ends with a headache. So during this time, I can't do anything. 
I hate it. I go into the Dr. on Wednesday and I am going to talk it through with them, so hopefully together we can figure out what I am doing wrong. 
At first I struggled with even writing the blog, but I thought, this is the whole purpose of writing it. To educate people on the gastric sleeve surgery. And with me, this is part of it. Today after this episode goes bye bye maybe I will feel like making some cards. Ha, I doubt it, then its lunch time. LOL Oh well, I will conquer this, you just wait.

2017

I have been cleared to do exercise, so today starts the day. My fitness instructor turned me onto this "TRX"

It uses your own body weight. I am actually able to do squats, even with my bad knee. All with the way you hold your body, it allows for all your weight not to be put on my knees. BTW since loosing 30 lbs. my knee is doing so much better. That was one of my goals with this sleeve operation. To put off surgery. So hopefully when more weight is off I can put off surgery for a long time, years maybe.
2017 is a good time for all of us to get healthy.  Come on friends, we can do this!!!!

Eve of Christmas Eve

Christmas Eve, and I have had the flu. You know from my last post that I was stopped up like mad. Well I did what the Dr. ordered and I did finally go. Thank you God.
 But then I got the sore throat, bad bad cough, freezing then hot, you know the drill. So getting everything ready for fun at Calie and Nate's home after church, I did to much and I was not able to go to church. Actually I really just wanted to stay home. But I knew there would be a sad little Boo. Church is almost over, I need to glaze the ham, but taking a shower and getting ready wore me out again. So here I sit.

I cleaned up ok,  and I don't know how to do a selfie for the life of me.
Have a very Merry Christmas, and whatever you do, don't get sick.

One month since surgery

I would and should be just so so happy that one month has gone by. They say that is the hardest of them all. However, I am having a hard time being so excited because for the last two weeks I, um, cough, cough, cough, lol have been completely constipated.  To the point that I am not able to get all my liquids down in a day, also food. I see food and I gag. Not to mention the freaking pain in my gut.
But yesterday I met with all my different specialists for my one month check. And, its very common at this time because two weeks ago is when I started eating food, instead of something soft and pureed. Ok that makes since, but still doesn't solve my problem lol.
First off, I was weighed. 216 lbs. I started at 244lbs. so down 28lbs. I told Mark, that I have 2 lbs. of $hit stuck in me, so I'm saying 30 lbs. LOLOL Hey, I have to make fun of this miserable moment. LOL
I then did the bod pod. Which tells us the percentage of fat verses muscle that is being lost. I am almost 50/50. They told me, that this is pretty much the norm at this time, because I am in the process of figuring out what to eat and when to eat and how much to eat. Also I get to introduce exercising.
They want me for the next two months to really concentrate on finding the foods that work for me but have high protein.
Next was exercise. I had purchased the TRX about a month ago to prepare for when I could start to exercise. Especially because Nate, my trainer had me try it and it didn't hurt my knee.
Here it is. This girl is using it outside, but we are attaching it to a stud on our wall. This works for me on so many levels. With a messed up neck and back, knee and very over weight, This TRX helps with holding some of my body weight. So Nate showed me the exercises he wants me to start. I have to say, this feels pretty good.
Next appointment was with the nutritionist. She told me what I could do for my constipation since Milk of magnisa was NOT lol working. And she gave me some recipes of different foods baked up into muffin tins and then frozen. Easy to pull out for a lunch.  I am all over this, because lunch has been a hard one for me.
Next off to psych. We learned that going through  a major thing like this in your life can start problems with relationships if you both are not aware what to look for and to understand why different things are happening. Also, she taught us about how others will start to treat me once it becomes more obvious whats happening with me. And how important it is to  my psychy to say the right thing back to people. I know this probably doesn't make any sense to you the reader, but for me it was a very good session.
This company Eviva is just awesome. This aftercare that they do for their patients is second to none.
Next appointment for me will be in a month here in Bellingham. And I think I am not going to weigh myself until then. 
Oh, did I tell you????? I have had an entire week with regular coffee. Whoooo HOOOOOO. LOL

It's been awhile

Everything has been going pretty good. I am learning all about food in a brand new way. 
With me, its not been that I am an over eater, never really had been.  When I am skinny and exercising, I can pretty much eat what ever I want. But since getting hurt and being sedentary for the first two years ruined that for me. When my heart and soul is not into exercising, (because I couldn't after getting hurt)  Is where the wheels fell off for me. Loved my ice cream, especially at night. It takes a lot to gain 100lbs. 
So I have been asked by a couple people. "If you had to change your eating habits so drastically before and after this surgery, why didn't you just continue on your own? You are already down 1/4 of the weight.
My answer to these questions is......
It is so much more then to just keep going. When you are this much over weight, you can't exercise because of your injuries and then later your injuries and your weight.  There is no way, and I mean no way possible for me or anyone to be able to loose 100 lbs. without exercise. Not to mention my
left knee. I hurt it in gymnastics when I was in middle school. But now, OMG is it bad. Right before surgery, on a scale of 1 to 10, my pain was a 12. I was ready for surgery right then, cause I couldn't take it a second longer. However part of the reason for this surgery is because I was hoping to push surgery off for a few more years if I got some weight off. Well let me tell you this, I am not sure how much I have lost right now ( I will weigh at Dr. office on Monday) but as of day 17 and down 23 lbs. my knee is already better. Is the pain gone? No! but it sure is tolerable.  So I am already seeing a perk from having this done.
As I said in the very beginning of my blog posts, everyone thinks differently, this surgery was in no way shape or form "The easy way out" Its been work, the education I am getting is incredible.
For me, this has been the best decision of my life, and for the future of my life.
I think sometimes before we ask questions of people that we really know nothing about, that we should educate ourselves a little more. See, even this has been educational for me.
My cousin Lynn has told me two or three times now, "I can see the spark back in your eyes" 
You know what, I hadn't realized I lost it. But I sure get it, I can finally see a light at the end of my tunnel.

Check this out

Well since I wrote last, I have learned a couple things. Plus still trying to figure some things out. Not an easy task I tell ya.
Markie and I went out to do a couple things one evening. Mostly buy his mom and dad new lights and ornaments because we have put their old ones somewhere, and we don't know where. We just have to go through our storage. Any way off the subject.
So our first time out, all I can think of is what in the world can I eat? what if I don't eat at the right time? what if I start to get sick in the store? Thinking about all this really makes ya nervous. We didn't have time to go to a sit down restaurant, which would of been easier. And then I remembered Wendy's chili. Protein, yes! So we go to Wendy's. Cost .40 more cents to get one tablespoon of cheese on my chili. WTW! Oh well I had to do it, I needed more protein. I ate maybe 1/4 cup, and a two crackers. But I felt good and took the rest home.
Another night, Mark and I were watching a movie that was super intense, so I wasn't really paying much attention to my body while I was eating my snack of saltines and peanut butter. BIG, HUGE, MISTAKE. I started not feeling good, but thought if I just keep my mind on the movie I won't feel so sick.  NOPE, that didn't work one bit. Mark looked over at me and asked if I was sleeping, I could hardly get out of my mouth that I was sick. So he paused the movie, while I continued to get sicker and sicker. You see with such a little pouch left for a tummy, I really need to be careful on what goes in my mouth at all times, and especially how much and how fast. 
This dumping was the worst yet, Markie had to get me a bag to breath in because I started hyperventilating.  Thank God he did that. Now I could open my eyes, so I asked Markie if he would just tuck me in, I HAD to go to bed.
The next morning was just fine, but boy was I scared to eat anything. I am telling you all this because I am going to show you some pictures of the operation. One you will see him fixing my hernia, also stapling my stomach and then you will see the part of my stomach they removed.

                                                                             
                                                                               

So, as you can see my tummy is small. Finding the right foods at just the right time is tough. At this point of all this, I could no way go out somewhere all day. I would be scared. I know as time goes on and I learn more, I will feel more confident in myself. But not right yet. Its three weeks today, that I had my surgery, so for women or men that had to go back to work, I think it could be a little hard. But heck everyone is different.
I hope I didn't gross you out too much.

Two week check up by phone

14 days have gone by since my surgery, seems so strange that I have already had it.
Yesterday and this morning, have not been the best days. The thought of one more premier chocolate protein shake makes me just gag. Greek yogurt, just not digging it right now. Broth, or soup UGH!! Every single thing I think of I am making myself sick. However I have to eat, food fuels the body, and I can only take in so much that it needs to be protein. So this was Monday yesterday, and I broke the rules. And I am NOT a rule breaker, lolol But I couldn't take it anymore. So I scrambled up two eggs with cheese, I sat down and slowly took baby bites, chewing it up really well, waiting in between bites to make sure it wasn't going to come back up or make me deadly sick.
 HOLY BUCKETS do you know how freaking good those were? WOW, its crazy just two weeks without reg. food and you forget how yummy it is. I was able to get down about 1 egg, and all went well. Dontae finished them for me.
Later in the day the Nutritionist called me for my two week check up. It was so so great to talk to her. I had already been graduated to purred food, and was supposed to stay there until Thursday. See the rebel I am.....
Anyway I told her that I was actually hungry (I have not been hungry yet) She said that means I am ready to move to soft foods. SCREAM, YELL, DANCE IF I COULD. I calmly said "what".           She had no idea that I was going crazy on the inside. But she said I am ahead of the game, my body is doing really well. Whew!!!!!!!! I got away with the scrambled eggs. Actually that was a stupid thing for me to do, because I could of got really sick, and that kind of sick is off the charts terrible. So Thank you God for allowing me pure bliss with those eggs.
Need to be taking certain vitamins daily, I will need to do this the rest of my life. But I can now have hamburger, cheese, ritz crackers, saltine crackers, tuna, salmon, any fish potato's veggies. Need to be very careful with pasta. Sometimes one bite of pasta will swell up in tummy to like 3 bites, and then by the time I would feel that, I would already be into whats called "dumping" I already told you about that lovely thing. So lets just say today was a much better day as far as food goes. To give you an example of how much I can actually eat. At lunch I ate 1 heaping tablespoon of tuna on saltines. That took about a good 1/2 hour. lol If you are wondering why I didn't put it on bread since that is a soft food, is because when you chew bread up mixed with saliva and food, it sits in your tummy like a ball, until your enzymes work to break it up. The only thing is my tummy isn't much of a tummy, so the enzymes can't work fast enough to break it down before it wants to digest. And then the "dumping" would set it. So crackers it was.
So food selection is going so much better, She told me the first month is the hardest. Glad to hear that.
She told me to remember, I still just had surgery two weeks ago, my body is going to be tired, and I need to listen to it. I sure did appreciate everything she told me on the phone, I needed to hear all of it. Just perfect timing. Eviva, is an amazing place.

Thanksgiving

 So getting ready for Thanksgiving I go to get dressed. I was going to dress below casual cause I was afraid clothes would rub on my incisions. So I put on my one pair of whatever they are called on,
(not sweats, but not yoga pants) And holy buckets couldn't wear those, so I put on a size smaller pair that I bought for this time but forgot to wash them and they were way to long,  Whooo Yawww
 they fit, just to long. Now what? Well I had bought one more pair of cute black jeans one size smaller, I thought I would just try them on even though I wasn't going to wear them. Never thought in a million years that they would fit yet. Holy cow, I almost threw up. They fit!!! So did I wear them? Heck ya!  Could anyone tell, other then my Markie NO, but you know what? that didn't matter one bit, because I knew.  You see I could diet on my own and get down this much weight, but that was without exercising. You read all my blogs so I don't need to tell you why again, so consequently it would come right back, and also just a little more. Never ending. 
But this time in those pants, I know for a pure fact that I will grow out of those pants just like every stinking other time in my life, only because they were to big, not because I gained the weight back. 
I just Thank God 100 times a day that I was able to make this work, so Markie and I will be around for Dontae for a long long many more years, because I will be healthy.                             
And today it just so happened that on Turkey day my ALL liquid diet was now pureed. So my dinner consisted of 1 tablespoon mashed potatoes, and sugar free jello with a little whipped cream. Oh and a tiny bit of squash. I couldn't tell you how darn excited I was.  The kicker was when I put that first bite of mashed potatoes in my mouth, I just about freaking jumped to the roof. The taste LOL was so incredible. I could taste every single little taste in that potato. 
Actually it was kinda strange, but oh was it good. So for lunch today, I experienced the same thing, 
All in  All  I had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

My First Checkup after Surgery

Today was my 9 day checkup after surgery. Eviva is such a wonderful place. They just moved into a new place, right under Scotty Browns. Right now they are only open on Wednesdays, because all of their staff drive from Edmonds. But that will be changing. But its been working for me, to be able to have most of my appointments here and only a few in Edmonds. Any hoo great great place, great people and extremely educational.
Ok I kinda went off what I was talking about. With today being my Dr. appointment 9 days after surgery. So you remember the two weeks before surgery I needed to be on a low carb diet right? And I lost 6 lbs. So today I step on the  scale and I lost 13 lbs in 9 days, added to my 6 that's 19 lbs.
What the What!!!!!!!!
Please don't think, (well anyone can do that if they had surgery) Because I will tell you right now, it is a complete life changer. Nothing will ever be like before again. Yes it is nice to never be hungry, No its terrible if you don't get enough protein in your body and now your feeling sick. It sucks actually when you are so thirsty that all you want to do is throw back a bottle of water. Well good luck with that pal, its going to come up faster then it went down, or you drink your drink too fast not letting it settle in properly, then you become extremely sick. Will have to add protein powder to my foods for the rest of my life probably. Prolly never will be able to have bread or rolls again. There is so much more, that I learn daily of how to change my  life.
But the reason why I did this was because of my son Dontae. God picked me to be his Mama, that means something to me. I need to be here for him. Here is who God gave me.

It is also my 16th Anniversary today

So  yesterday being a hard day for a couple of reasons, It seems every time I get to a good place in my day when drinking water is going very good, the gas is going good, the coughing thingy is going well to. Today and everyday is a NEW day a new Beginning!

What I mean by that is, today HEART BURN, heart burn, did I say heart BURN? Holy buckets!
I don't get heart burn very often, so to me I thought I was going drop dead. LOL It hurt when I just breathed, it hurt when I smiled and it really hurt when I had to drink. Not to mention the wanting to sleep every minute  of every day. And that I am chalking up to pain killers. So after about three
 Gas X, a couple of Omeprazole and tums and as of right this second I am good. Thank you God, cause boy did that hurt.
I am now eating and have been for a couple of days, but only liquids like chicken broth,tomato soup, greek yogurt, sugar free chocolate pudding, sugar free jello. But I have to use a baby spoon. If I was to use a reg. teaspoon that would probably make it come right back up. It takes quite some time to get a half a cup of soup down.
With Gods help I will get there, and I couldn't be more excited.
Ok now comes another embarrassing picture, But I don't have a good enough mirror to see myself so  Markie has to take a picture. The first one is one you have seen already, the second is 5 days later.
I am bruising more now, but part of my stomach has already gone down a bit.

I know the second picture actually looks bigger when you glance at it, but thats because Markie was closer then the first one. But Look at the first picture at the belly button, do you see the wave of fat that goes across under my belly button? Now look at second picture, that wave is not so pronounced.
It might seem like nothing to you, but for someone who needed this for years is over joyed.

November 18th is the forth day after surgery

I am trying to play catch up because today is actually the 6th. day after surgery, but I need to go back and explain then it will all make sense.
Remember on the last blog I was saying how good I felt, well today all I do is sleep and drink these two beauties.

However, you have to remember that I can't be like everyone else and just pick this puppy up and gulp it down, even when Im so thirsty. This is what I have to use.

You know these things especially if you had or have children. The only difference is I have to squeeze it together and tighten my lips around it, while I take a sip as not to let any air in while I drink. The only way I can do this so it doesn't hurt me is to drink this amount in three sips, So you can see how long it takes to get 8 oz. down.
After every sip I have to wait a few while my stomach on up to throat area do there gurgling and everything went down good. If I take too big of a sip you can had terrible heart burn to the list.
After Dontae and I take a nap, I will finish up to today.

Day three ,

This is the blog that I will show one embarrassing picture of myself. But not until I write my post.
Today is the hardest for me as of right now. Pain wise... Some questions you might want to be asking is, "how can you survive on a clear liquid diet?" Well you can for a couple of days, I probably could go for  days because I haven't felt hungry yet. The last time I ate was 5:30pm on the 13th.
The other thing I want to tell you is the anesthesia is completely worn off , so I am relying on pain meds  Oxy every 6 hours and Valium a hour before or after, Tylenol. Part of the reason that I am in the pain I am into today, Is hubby forgot to set his alarm to give me my night time meds, so when I woke up this morning. HOLY COW was I in pain. Even the shoulder pain they said I would have but haven't. So slowly but surely we are getting me caught up. The nurse just called and told me to keep the pain more under control is to take the oxy every two hours. The only thing with that is, I would be sleeping even more then I do now. and I wouldn't be getting any exercise. So I am going to play that one by ear for now.
Have to tell you what a wonderful husband I have, there is no way I could be doing this without him. After I ate my Popsicle, a few minutes later he brought me my tooth brush with tooth paste on it and water and a towel. He knew that I just couldn't get to the bathroom as of yet. And the fact that he probably couldn't stand looking at my red teeth for the Popsicle. lol
Now all of you reading this, I am going so far out of my comfort zone, that I am amazed I can even post this picture. I am because I have already had a couple of people reach out to me about there life, and want to talk to someone that is going through the same thing or just thinking about.
Here goes. No worries, the bottom let is not infected, just a good size bruise. That is the one that bothers me the worse, because that is the one they pulled my stomach through.

Surgery

 DISCLAIMER,,,, I am on pain meds, just remember that when you are reading this.LOL

So what I said in my last post of eating only 40grams of Carbs per day, to shrink my liver.
Come to find out I lost 6lbs. So I can say I was stoked . Then they put me in a little gown and did a workup on me.

Eviva Cener,  it is like no other.  The first time walking through the door, I  knew this was the place,
I walked into Eviva, they treat me so nice. My name was called and back I went to get ready for my surgery. I had been told many times with putting a tube down my throat and two more going to my stomach, I would endure pain, but because of my hernia it might just hurt the same or more. That I would have a terrible sore throat and hardly be able to swallow, even an ounce of water. I had been preparing for this for a long time.  After surgery, my throat was so horse I was so parched, so they gave me a sip of water and could hear my voice getting back to normal.Well, just as I was done drinking the little ounce of water I noticed my throat did not hurt one bit. Oh boy, talk about being so so happy, Cause that's the worst.
  In to bed I went, which is my recliner, I won't be able to be lying down for some time. We are keeping my pain under control, I am walking laps up and down the hallway. not to mention sleeping a lot.I am sure when the anestthetic  wears off ,and I am only on pain meds, that I will feel different and possibly in more pain..
Now look what my special nurse gave me,

Pre-Op

Not to happy with my technical skills. I made a video to catch you all up because I am preparing for my surgery, and I thought it would be much faster. Well it won't post. Of course it won't lolol. Soooo
I will catch you up. Two weeks prior to my surgery I need to be on a low carb diet no more then 40 grams a day for a full two weeks. Some of you I am sure do this type of diet already, but I found 40 grams to not to be very much. I also did not realize what all has carbs in it. So that was an eye opener for me. So I stuck with protein.  Tonight was the last night of my two weeks and I did great. The reason for the low carb diet is because when they go in, they need to move my liver out of the way, they said kinda flip it up, so they can continue to cut out my stomach. So the low carbs shrink the liver. IKR!!!!!! LOL maybe all of you knew that already, but I am learning new things right and left. 
With the liver shrunk, it guarantees that they can do the entire surgery laposcopically. Spelled wrong again, I think I will have to learn to spell this darn word. 
Tonight ALL food stopped at 6:00PM, all liquids stop at midnight. Tomorrow morning at 6:30AM I need to take a pill that cost me $102.00.  It just happens to be a pill that chemo patients take for nausea. I asked them if there was a cheaper pill, and they said this certain pill is the one they want me to have, because it takes away the severe nausea that I guess people get right after surgery. I may not get it, but I also don't want to find out. Could you imagine being sick and throwing up after that surgery. Oh hell no. 
We will head down to Edmonds tomorrow about 6:45AM I believe my surgery is at 8:45AM.
Oh one of the instructions was to CLEAN out your belly button. LMAO... What?????? They told me that the one incision is right close to the belly button, and they don't want whatever is in there to cause an infection. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL Yes I am still laughing about it.  Who doesn't clean out their belly button? Well I guess if you have an outie you wouldn't have too. Cause there was the day that I did have an outie. LOL But not anymore, so yes I clean it. And yes it will be sparkly for the nurses tomorrow.  I just don't know why that cracks me up.
I will spend one night. If I didn't have a C Pap machine then I would of came right home, and it would of saved me $1200.00 from my bank account. Oh well, better safe then sorry. And heck they told me that I would probably be off the C Pap with in two months.  Whoo Yaw!!!!!!
Markie will stay in a near by hotel and be back to pick me up at 5:00AM. They tell me my first ounce of water to drink after surgery could take two hours. You see its stuff like that, that they have you see a physiologist for so many visits, and  will encourage me to see one after. Which I believe is very important. You really need to learn skills to get you through some of the things I will be experiencing.
Yes, I have been through many steps to get to this day, I have learned so much and so much about myself. That I couldn't be more thrilled that my day has come. I have been praying about this for so long that I am not worried one bit, I am not scared, I am only excited to begin my new future. One that can do more with Dontae and go more places with Dontae and will be able to go on walks again. My dreams are endless. I want to be around for my Boo for all long as God grants me.
Ok, my friends, please pray for my Dr. to have God lead him every step of the way during my surgery, and pray that I will have little pain, no nausea and that everything will go perfect. 
Just so ya know, it is ok to leave comments.